Tuesday, July 19, 2016

The Forgotten Pieces By Tabitha Beck some interesting observation I totally agree with

* Names are strange things. I have nicknames. I have my given name. I have my spiritual name. All of them are a part of me, and yet none of them are me. Some days, putting myself in that box and writing the name of the contents of the box on the outside of the container is too difficult. Some days, there is no naming me.
Where do you stand? What is your name? Your true name? Your given name? The name that resonates with you?


In regards to my children, why treat them and their friends and lovers like criminals? Why not trust them, all of them, as people, who learn and grow, the same way I did when I was younger, the same way I do now? Why not respect them enough as people, as individuals, and allow them to live their lives without all the hassle and micromanagement that R seems to need to have? Why not trust myself as a parent who raised my children to know the good from the bad? Why not trust my children, period? Why not give them that respect?

When something is important to you, you make time for it. If something is real for you, you make it happen in your life. If you really want something, you create time, you create space, you create funds. It's when you really don't want something that you never find the time, the space, the money, the whatever...if it truly means something to you, you do it. End of statement. No excuses. Period.
I know someone else who hasn't worked for who knows how long, but swears up and down she wants to go back to work, she wants to go to school, she wants to do a million things. Her son goes to daycare every day too, just like my friend's daughter. Her husband works hard, brings home a paycheck. He's there to help. They live in the city where this woman was raised. She has many many friends here. She has family here. She has neighbors next door that would be willing to help out, so she says all the time. This particular woman makes me want to laugh and cry all at the same time. She "tries" to get a job, but she just can't find one. Dad drops the boy off at daycare most mornings. She has to pick him up by 6p. She's had to turn down jobs because she has to pick her son up and she won't get off until 6p and it will be too late for her to pick her kid up.

That to me is a smack to the face to every working parent in the world, including her own husband. This is so my own stuff here. How can you justify, in a city where you have family and friends and neighbors and everything else who would be more than willing to reach out and help you by picking your kid up from daycare...just sitting there all day every day...whining about how terrible things are, how you need a job, how you need a hundred other things...but when the opportunity arises, you smack it away and say it is not good enough?
That to me is a smack to the face to every working parent in the world, including her own husband. This is so my own stuff here. How can you justify, in a city where you have family and friends and neighbors and everything else who would be more than willing to reach out and help you by picking your kid up from daycare...just sitting there all day every day...whining about how terrible things are, how you need a job, how you need a hundred other things...but when the opportunity arises, you smack it away and say it is not good enough?
This is an insult to my friend who gave up everything, who cried herself to sleep for nearly two years, because she was barely hanging on, after moving away from friends and family, after having to trust strangers to take care of her daughter and make enough money to pay the babysitters, and her bills, and still be able to eat....

*

The Forgotten Pieces By Tabitha Beck

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